Shall We Dance?

   Have you ever felt like you were living the life of someone else? As if the person that you are that day, isnt you at all? I have felt like a wallflower; looking at the dancing going around me, but not dancing myself. That doesnt sound like me at all! 

   I imagine that I am at a ball and the most handsome man in the entire room walks up to me and asks "Shall we dance?" The excitement overwhelms me and my giddy squeals are inaudible. He is by far the best dancer ever, but I dont know His steps. I dont know how He leads, so I hesitate. My distrust means He cant guide me as He wants. But instead of giving up and trying to find another partner. He asks again, "Shall we dance?" The more I dance with Him, the more I trust. The more I dance, the more I learn the steadiness of His arms around me and the tender strength He uses to guide me. He is such a gentleman, asking me to dance instead of forcing me onto the floor. 

   He reaches out His hand and asks me that familiar question and I take a hold! Suddenly, I am dancing like I have never danced before! I dare not let go as He gracefully leads me across the room. He spins me and dips me; I turn with a purpose and leap across the room! Everyone is staring at this amazing dancer and I smile in awe because its the only thing I know to do. The room gets silent, because this dancer has taken their breath away and I am His endlessly lucky partner, getting to dance in the light He is exuding! My heart screams YAY GOD as I fall more in love with each step....

   I am no wallflower. I am not some timid girl who doesnt want to leap across the room with Jesus! That is not the dancer He made me, not at all! So I will take His hand and trust Him to teach me how to dance the dance He has planned for me. 

   My question to everyone reading this is, is God asking the same thing? Has the most handsome man in the room approached you and asked "Shall we dance?" 

   

Random Adventures thus far...

- tried Vegemite (i dont recommend it)
- went to the Gold Coast and lost one of my roomates
- went to Brisbane and lost another one of my roomates
- befriended a gecko named Jonah
- somehow got known around the base by my laugh... apparently i can be loud, who knew?!
- modeled in a medieval fashion show 
- got killed by a poisonous dart by an old lady in an Australian short film
- wake up monday, tuesday, and thursday at 5:50 for our 6am practices
- had to learn to let go when Jeffrey became the "Base Bear" 
- became addicted to "Tim Tam Slams"
- attempt to make a mocha each morning with nasty protein powder and instant coffee
- repeatedly fall off the top bunk in the mornings
- accidentally swung off like Tarzan once...
- flipped a coin onto my head
- got trapped on a train 
- saw my best friend in the entire world!
- tried and failed to do an Australian accent
- performed my first solo dance at a medieval festival
- died and streak of my hair red

more to come! YAY GOD!

Tulips and Oak Trees

    A lovely girl I dance with named, Amanda, taught me this little analogy. She said that everyone is a tulip or and oak tree. Sometimes, you are strong and can handle things on your own (like an oak tree) and sometimes you are delicate (like a tulip) and need someone to come along side you.
   I feel like a tulip today as God has asked me to surrender my family to Him. This has actually been something He has been consistently asking of me, but I haven't really been grasping what that means until recently.
   My family is everything to me. My parents have taught me almost everything I know; my brothers and sisters filled in the rest. There isn't a story worth telling that doesn't have one of them involved. They are my smile! Which is why my senior year was probably my hardest. My parents marriage was ending, roughly. And we were all hurting. The enemy just tore into us like I had never seen and before I knew it, my family didn't seem like my family anymore... But then came healing. I felt God telling me to move out of my parents house for my health because the stress was a little too much too handle. But our faithful God put me in the best place I could have imagined and He went to work mending my heart.
   This past year, I have seen Him do the same thing for my family as a whole and individuals. One of my favorite things about my family, is that we are survivors, but not every one has realized it yet. But they don't always see what I see in them; the people God has made them or is making them to be.
    My dad is the most persevering man I know. He has sacrificed everything for us and being "Daddy's little girl" is probably my most favorite role in the world. He is always there.
    My mama is the strongest woman I have ever known. Her way with people is so infectious and inspiring. On my weakest days, she was her strongest as she never stopped fighting for me. If I am half the woman she is, then I will consider myself immensely blessed.
  My big sisters are beautiful! And I don't just mean that they are outwardly breath-taking (which they are), but I mean in the sense that their HEARTS possess true beauty. They are strong like my mama and they are woman that you cant help to notice because there is something attractively different about them.
  And my brothers... oh my dear brothers. They are everything a sister could ever hope and want. These young men are passionate and bold; there ferocity for the things they love will stop every one in their tracks.

That is my family. That is the family that God created for me to have and I have a dream. I have a dream for my family that one day, we will come together again as more than just biological family, but as brothers and sisters in Christ! I dream we are standing together, fighting! Fighting for the things of God and purely for His glory! Whether its in the central valley of California, or the depths of an unreached nation; we are there fighting. My parents, divorced or not, have laid aside their differences and offer their unique talents and gifts for much more than this world can offer. My sisters tender hearts and strong voices speak out for those who don't have the freedom to speak at all. And my brothers, my brothers that are built to lead nations, are there! Being the leaders God has called them to be and leading the lost from the darkness. Our husbands/wives/children are with us, and we are all united as one team under God. And together, the Holy Spirit uses us to bring His love to those who have never experienced it!
    That may just be a childlike fantasy that a little girl who loves her family so much desires. However, this little girl, chooses to believe that it is her families calling! To be an oak when the other is a tulip. To submit ourselves as one unit over to the Holy Spirit so He can use us for much greater things then we could have ever imagined. That this time of healing, brings us closer than we could have ever known.
    So Lord, I trust You. I know in my heart of hearts that You are working in my family and drawing us all to You. You wont give up on us! You love them more than I ever could and You hear my cries. You hear my heart screaming "Not my family! We will not be broken!". And You have answered, You have answered with love, patience, and gentleness. Thank you for endlessly being our "oak tree". Thank you God, for taking my family into Your steady hands and not letting go. Amen.
 
 

Joyce

    Isnt it great how our God can take instances in your life and use it time and time again to teach you knew things? That is what I experienced this week with a memory from when I was a little girl.
    It was a Sunday morning and I woke up with a purpose. I went to my dad, still in my pjs, and told him that I wanted to make a card for our neighbor Joyce. Joyce, was not a nice lady. I remember her always yelling at me and my siblings for getting to close to her garden or being too loud during the day. But that morning, I KNEW that I needed to make her a card. So I did. It wasnt an astounding piece of art work in the least; just a little picture of the sun (probably with sunglasses on) and my sloppy, childlike writing that was  illegible. When I approached her door, I had no fear like the previous times in the past (we usually tried to avoid her at all costs). She answered fairly quickly and with a surprisingly kind smile, had me read my card out loud for her. As I looked up expecting a reaffirming smile at my brilliant diction, I saw instead that she was crying. She said to me "thank you so much for that card Paige, I really needed it today. You see, my mom died last night and I am really sad." My heart broke with the idea of anyone's mom dying and I did all I knew to do when someone was sad, I hugged her.
     On my way home, I was ecstatic! I knew God wanted me to write that card for her and I couldnt wait to tell my parents how nice she was! As fast as my "yittle yegs" and slippers would take me, I hurried home to my ever encouraging parents to tell them the story.
     Over the years this story and Joyce has come to mind. For the years after that day Joyce was nothing but nice to us! It was as if a completely new lady had moved in down the street! The change was evident and I never really understood until now. Whenever my dad told the story I would feel the excitement I had that day, knowing that I had done something right. I also patted myself on the back for being "such a sweet kid", but my perception of it was so closed off. The point of the story was not me being sweet or Joyce needing a hug of a child, it was about what God could do. God loves us all individually, but acts for the purpose of the whole community. Our God is so powerful that EVERYTHING He does ripples into more. Through the simple act of obeying His call to write a letter, He began the process of teaching me to hear His voice and taught me an important lesson of who He wanted me to be. And just as my parents were excited for their little girl, so was He - and I could feel it! But He didnt stop there, He melted the heart of an old woman and as far as I could tell, changed her life. It was a BEAUTIFUL act of our God that rippled into mine, my families, Joyces, and who knows how many others lives. That is the God who created us! A God, that comforts you in the least expected ways, that melts your heart with His love, and guides us with His voice. YAY GOD!

Thank you Lord for Your love! A love that never ceases to have a rippling affect! Thank you Father, for always, outrageously loving your children! Amen.

A Beautiful Princess of the King

"And it is My desire to lavish My love on you" 1 John 3:1

     I promised that I would be honest with my blog and so I will be. God has just been pouring His love on me since I have been here. I came here thinking I knew Gods love for me, but I was so wrong! And just as He promised, He has been showing me what His love means in my life!

      I am a beautiful Princess of the King. I love you Daddy! I want to know and believe the truth you speak over me! I love love love you! You have made me a precious jewel and you gather me in your arms and hold me close! You want me to shine like You! You want me to be the moon. A moon that lights the night sky because I am reflecting You! I reflect You to light a dark world. I belong to You, Abba. I belong to You and You treasure me! I love You Lord! How can a God who created the heavens and the earth, find me beautiful? You gave song to every bird in the sky and yet You love to hear my songs for You! You taught the waves how to be tossed about in the ocean and yet You smile in my dances for You! You are everything! You are I AM and yet you allow me to call You, Father. Your love floors me, yet you help me soar! Thank you, thank you, thank you Lord!!!

       As the verse reads, God wants to LAVISH His love on us and boy does He! The term, Beautiful Princess of the King was the term God had just recently been spoken over me. I didnt truly grasp what it meant until today. That was when I realized, God had been trying to show me that from the beginning! I am the youngest girl out of 6 children; automatically making me the Princess. I was always Daddy's little girl and that remains true today. However, I never realized that it was the role that God himself had given me. 

    I have just been bubbling and bursting with joy today because I am loved. And Gods love is all I need. I pray the same for all who are reading this. That you encounter God and are so overwhelmed by His love that  you never look back! Because 1 John 3:1, is for all of us so we should rejoice and be glad in it! 

This is Pure of Heart by Kari Evans. She is a MAD student focusing on photography and her first assignment was to show her name meaning: Pure of Heart. When she asked me to be her model, I struggled because I have never considered myself pure of heart. God worked in my heart that day and this is such a YAY GOD moment for me! Thank you Lord for being our Redeemer!

Y.H.W.H

YHWH (yahweh) this name of god has absolutely blown my mind! 

YHWH

Yud.            He.      Wad.      He.

Hand.   Window/behold.     Nail.     Behold.

translation: Behold the Hand, behold the Nail

The name yahweh was one of the most holy of names for God from the very beginning! This was before Jesus died on the cross; years and years before God ever even sent Him to earth! It is so beautiful to see that God is savior. Savior is one of the endless characteristics of God. He didnt BECOME a savior just because we needed it. He has always/and always will be a savior; He just chose then to reveal it to us. God is so good!!! He knew the need before we ever could imagine because he knew we would need Him. We need all aspects of Him whether we can put that into words or not. He was and is a savior and because He loves us, He is ours! YAY GOD!!!

That is one of the many incredible aspects of Gods character I have been learning about this week in my lectures. Our first week is on the Character and Nature of God and its fantastic!!! All these years, i thought i understood that God loved me. He promised me this week that I have NO IDEA how much He actually does. He also promised me, that He will show me :) 

YAY GOD!!!

      This past week has been so fun! it was a whole lot of orientation and getting to know each other, but what a week its been! this past saturday we went to the park and played sports. it was quite interesting watching all these art oriented people try and figure out how to play sports. (especially for me) but it was a blast! i am still sore, but my team won a game!!! i had to run around and i actually ran kind of fast! yay god! they all teased me a bit by my inability to not scream when trying to do a play but that was bound to happen.
  On sunday, we all went out to breakfast. the breakfast here at the base consists of cold cereal and toast; naturally, we were craving some eggs and bacon! afterwards, we did a bit of shopping at the mall for a few things we needed. as fun as it all was i was floored by the price of everything! the minimum wage here is $16 so everything is way more expensive!!! its tough adjusting and slightly intimidating. but oh well, god will provide! just like he will provide the rest of my outreach costs and my living expenses. Later that night was amazing! My friends and i missed church so we could eat dinner here so we did our own thing! what was going to be a little bit of worship then discussion turned into the most incredible worship time i have had in a long time! We were sitting around singing and i just felt god telling me to "dance". of course i went through the process of debating/doubting. but i decided to just go for it! so i danced! it was the first time i had ever danced during worship and completely surrendered the movement to the lord. and it was liberating! people were singing and praying and reading scripture. one moment people are crying and the next i am so overcome with joy that i burst out laughing and cant quiet down! our god is so amazing! he is a god that can bring people to their knees in tears and one second later have another bursting out in a fit of giggles because of his excitement. YAY GOD!
    This dts does SO much more than realized. we have a lot of homework to do, along with a lot of challenging courses and workshops. we also do weekly community outreaches on Wednesday. we are going to be doing art/sport in the park! a time where we will be inviting the entire neighborhood to come; play sports, paint, sing, dance, and eat with us! its going to be great fun and a good way to get to know some people from the community. that fun-filled afternoon will be filled by a worship night at our base that we open up to the community and invite them to worship with us. i am really looking forward to it all!
     Along with learning about all this, i started my dance focus class. and instead of intense training in technique it will be a complete focus on glorifying god. and we will learn how to use dance as communication, as intercession, and as a tool in spiritual warfare. i am so excited!!! to do these things, we will be doing improv and our own choreography. plus we will have a number of performances on stages and on our outreaches. there will be two big dances we will learn to perform, but one of the dances will not be seen by anyone. it will be just for God. i cant even describe to you guys how excited i am to start dancing with god.

thank you all for your continuous support! please be praying for me and my fellow YWAMers!

us looking awkward in the city!

the amazing girls in my room!

beautiful architecture in the city!

such pretty flowers!!!

this is part of the base i am at

ironically i was wishing that we would all be great friends. then i threw the penny directly up and it hit me on the top of my head; it instantly bonded us.

BRISBANE!!!