Can you feel the thunder?

     Sitting here on my porch absolutely blown away by the creativity and beauty of God. From my spot here, I look out and see palm trees and a bright variety of flowers. I hear birds singing their songs and an occasional distant rumble of thunder. It is currently stormy today. I love it when it storms! The rain pours down and the trees bend in the wind. The flowers, which you would think would wilt, instead welcome the rain and seem to stand stronger throughout the downpour.
     The flowers have figure out and embraced what I am still trying to grasp. That when the rain comes... it is a time to rejoice! Rejoice because God is God and He is good! Rejoice because He turns these rains into nourishment and I grow stronger because of them. Rejoice because the thunder means His presence and He will not leave my side.
     I find the notion that so many believers my age have; that when they are older they will have a better relationship with God, just plain silly. And when they are older they will start reading their bibles and really get to know God. All of my peers who say this, have not allowed themselves to fully experience Gods love. Because once you experience that... the things of this world will no longer satisfy you. And anyone who finds satisfaction in this world is merely kidding themselves.
    The idea that "one day" I will cling to God brings me back to the rain just outside the protection of my porch. The rains are here, as is the thunder, the time to cling is now. I guess my question is... can you feel the thunder? Not just hear it, but can you FEEL it? The trees are swaying and the birds are still singing... what are we doing?
     Lets Rejoice!

Sweet Surrender

     This past weeks lectures have been on Lordship: knowing the fear of God. What a week it has been! TO finish off the week, we spent 15 hours in a time of worship. At first I was afraid it was going to be a grueling 15 hours, but quite the opposite! I dont know why I would ever think that... I can easily spend that time with Becky - so how much more so would I want to spend that time with my best friend Jesus?
      We started by praise and then moved into a time of the most interesting worship I had ever been blessed to experience. Going into that night, I had no idea I would be tap dancing in a blue dress to worship my God. But what a great way to get to dance before my Father as His beautiful princess! After that, it was a time of surrender. Surrendering the things we held onto and laying them at the foot of the cross. We brought in items to represent those things that we wanted to surrender and literally laid them at the foot of the cross and spoke out for everyone to hear of what we were laying down. I laid down my family; releasing any responsibility that I felt for them and their well being and picked up faith that God loves them way more than I ever could and is taking care of them. I also laid down my passport. I have always told God to send me anywhere and I will go, but I needed to lay that down and if He calls me to stay and be a missionary in America - I will do it. I laid down the beautiful oragamy bouquet that my boyfriend made me for my birthday. Our relationship is something I lay down every day, but I wanted to do a physical act of that and in front of people. In laying down our relationship; I laid him down, my right to be married, and my future. The next thing was one of the hardest. My bear, Jeffrey, that my best friend had gotten me represented the relationships I hold so dear to my heart. It also represented my comfort. God asked me to not only lay this down, but to give it away to a girl who had let go of so much that night. I am a little embarrassed to admit just how hard it was to do that and sleeping without him will take some time getting used too. The last thing I surrendered was my control. My control of my dreams, identity, and everything else I tried to control. So I cut off my hair with a pair of kid scissors... Even as I was doing this I was trying to control how much I was cutting off. But the Holy Spirit kind of took over at that moment and I lost complete control of the scissors. My hair is currently very short and VERY uneven.At the time of doing this, I did not realize everything I was doing. I felt stripped bare and completely vulnerable to everyone around me and especially God. This was a mutual feelings among my fellow students and staff, but I had to wear mine. A constant reminder of the sweet surrender that opened me up in front of God and everyone. I have become a master at not showing people whats really going on underneath - in turn; I have consistently tried to do the same with God. Walking around with my little stump pony tail reminds me of the nightmares you would used to have of being in the school cafeteria naked. I hoped that after I did it, total peace and freedom would come over me.... but it is going to be a bit more of a process than that. So much came off with those 6 inches of hair... not only my control, what my idea of beauty way, my individuality (since everyone says I look like my big sister who has short hair and I wanted to be different), all the times I had set my goal before Gods, and my striving. But I know that my God is faithful and He will use this constant reminder to teach me what it means to be open and vulnerable in front of Him.
     So Daddy, it is all yours - every bit of it! I want you to have it all; every step I take, every breath I take, every relationship I make. If You arent the center or purpose of it - I dont want it. I am completely yours Father! Speak for Your servant is listening. SPEAK for Your servant is willing. SPEAK for Your servant is ready! Daddy, all I want is You. You are my hope, You are my smile, You are my desire. I will lay it all on the alter, every day, before You because You are all that I need. In your faithful name Jesus, Amen!

Go Pass It On Tour

Hello everyone!!! I apologize for the lack of blog posts the last few weeks. I was away on the Go Pass-It-On Tour. What is that you might ask? Oh, well let me tell you!!! The tour is actually a 3 year commitment from YWAM to bring the Word of God BACK to the Western world. It originated from my base here in Brisbane, when the churches of Australia and my base director wanted a change. We are physically running 16,000km across the Western world from east to west. This physical act of intercession is showing that God is taking back the land as His own.

                We go to small, rural towns and set up a huge tent! We start in Australia, then move to Western Europe, then to Canada and the United States. Throughout the week we do service projects, prayer walks, have nightly events in the tent with various speakers, and a completely free after school program for elementary school kids. We spend a week in each town and true to form; God always has something new for us in each town. Our purpose on this tour is not to start our own thing then leave, but to come alongside the pastors and churches that have devoted their lives to that town. We meet with them at the beginning of the week; hearing what God has placed on their hearts for the town and praying with them.

                Another aspect of the tour is the running. We run from town to town carrying a gold baton (bat-ton as they pronounce it here) to signify “passing on the wisdom of God to the next generation. We run anywhere from 4-8km. Each school does a different three week leg of the tour; so there are always news groups and fresh ideas to keep this tour passionate, intentional, and alive! For me, even the fact that God has healed me enough to be able to run was a fantastic testimony to His power and love!

                I had been anticipating this tour before I even knew it existed. Before going to YWAM, God gave me a reoccurring dream of a huge white tent in the center of a small town. The tent was overflowing with people! These people weren’t there for the free cookies or tea, or even the live music coming from within the tent; they were there because they couldn’t resist the Holy Spirit! The tent would move on, but what God had done inside it stayed within their hearts.

                The tour was everything I loved to do! It was challenging; we were constantly going/doing, meeting new people every day – getting a glimpse of their lives, tons of childrens ministries, tough work-projects that pushed us to the point of having no other choice but to rely on Gods strength to keep going, and so much more! Every day we saw or heard of how God was moving in our own hearts and especially the town. It was one giant YAY GOD moment!

                My biggest YAY GOD moment happened on our Friday night youth night in the second town we were in, Boonah. The topic that night was “identity” and we were challenged to go to the people next to us and pray for them. I approached three young girls and a random boy that ended up tagging along. The first part of the conversation was about what we saw in the mirror and our insecurities with that. As I was spouting about telling myself I am beautiful, the Holy Spirit floored my heart with the realization that I was talking to them just assuming that they knew Christ. God being a God of second chances, gave me the boldness to ask them if they had ever given their lives to Christ. I will never forget the look of uncertainty that was shared between them until one of them spoke up and said “we have no idea what that means”. At that moment, I realized what God was going to do in our conversation that night. We went to the back of the tent and just started talking about it. I was blown away by the fact that they had never been to church or knew anything of God and yet, were brimming with questions! We talked about who Jesus was and what He did on the cross, I explained heaven and hell, encouraged them that they can are were hearing Gods voice, how to hear his voice/ how to talk to Him, and what it meant when they did ask Him into their hearts.

                That night we prayed and ALL 4 OF THEM ACCEPTED JESUS INTO THEIR HEARTS! After that, God continued to move outrageously! Two girls to my left were sobbing and not understanding their tears of joy. The little one next to me was laughing uncontrollably (as was I) out of excitement for what God did, and the boy guy in the middle was looking around trying to figure out what the heck happened! It didn’t stop there… they started getting revelation after revelation of a different characteristic of God! One girl turned to me and asked me if I realized that God just doesn’t forgive us once, but every day! The other asked me who Matthew was before I even opened their new bibles to teach them how to use it. She said that God had told her “Matthew is important”. WOW! YAY GOD!!!! I still get giddy talking about it J I wonder how much more then angels are still celebrating!

                I also had my 20^th birthday while I was away on the tour. My birthday went as such;

Waking up – Me: “good morning God!!!”

God: “Good Paige, Happy Birthday! Hey, what’s that by your arm?”

I love how humorous our God can be; especially when He reminds me that all His creation is beautiful as I frantically try and remove the giant beetle from my sleeping bag at 4am. Hahahaha it still cracks me up!

                The rest of the day was spent surrounded by extraordinarily loving people and Gods gifts! I asked God for 2 things for my birthday; the opportunity to work with children and a new challenge! That afternoon was spent in an elementary running around playing “hunter” with a group of 4^th grade boys. And that night I was asked to be one of the main speakers in our youth night and to lead the alter call. Ask and you shall receive! Our God is so good J

                  As God promised in my dream, what He did in the tent has and will definitely live on in my heart. I jump for joy in the fact that it will in hundreds of others as well! To anyone reading this, please pray for the tour; the people running it, the towns we are going into, and the beautiful children of God that are receiving the message.

A Lover of the Unloved

   The other night, I awoke from an unforgettable dream. The dream took place in a very poor hospital in a third world country. There was a young, sickly girl giving labor. When she gave birth, the little girl came out premature, and covered with sores. There was not a chance that this little girl would live especially with the lack of good health care. The mother of the young girl giving birth quickly placed the baby on the other side of the room in fear of getting her daughter sick. As soon as the child was set down on the table, I rushed over and gathered her into my arms. For the only hour of her life, I held her, sang to her, and prayed that this little girl would go straight back to her Fathers arms. I was helpless, but I could love.

   I couldn't shake the reality of that dying baby girl. I began to talk to God about what that dream meant. And I realized that God has called and is preparing me for doing things of that nature. Giving love to the ones who would live their entire lives, no matter the length, without love. I am not a doctor, I am not a politician, I am not a person of great influence, BUT I am a daughter of the King. And being that has taught me what real love is!

    Abba, You are good! We are unworthy of Your love and yet you lavish it on us! Daddy, I just want you. I look at this world and my heart breaks from all the pain and hurt; I cant even imagine how You feel. But I want too. I want to know Your heart. Teach my heart to love like You do and make me strong enough to do it. I cant do this without You and I definitely dont even want to try. Fill me up God, I am desperate for more of You. Amen. 

    

My Savior Sings!

   Jesus Christ died on the cross for our sins. He took ALL of our sins upon Himself and allowed Himself to be shamed, beaten, and hung up on a cross. Why? Because He loves me!
   I feel like I take this story for granted, because it is spoken about so frequently. I am such a silly person! The fact that Jesus died for us is the greatest act of love our world has ever known and that SHOULD NEVER be taken for granted! But there was apart of this story that never rubbed me the right way. In Matthew 27:46, Jesus is on the cross and cries out saying "My God, my God, why have you forsaken me?" and it has been taught that God had to look away from His beloved son because of the sin that was on him. But that doesnt sound like my God. My God has taken me as I am, sin and all, He forgave me and took me into His arms. He has NEVER turned His back on me even in my lowest of lows. That's my God!
    So the speaker this week asked us to look at Psalm 22. This Psalm starts off with "My God, My God, why have you forsaken me? Why are you so far from saving me, so far from the words of my groaning?" sound familiar? Now in that time, a Jewish boy would have had the Torah memorized, but if He showed promise then He would have been given the opportunity to memorize then ENTIRE Old Testament. Jesus displays His knowledge of the written Word many times throughout His life by saying "It is written.." So there is no reason He wouldnt know this Psalm.
    And in this particular Psalm, David prophesied Jesus death! In verses 16-18, David speaks of the piercing in Jesus' hands and feet and even the lots cast for His clothing!!!!! My mind can still not wrap around this! But directly after that, in verse 19, David says "But You, O Lord, be not far off; O my strength come quickly to help me". It is a promise, that God is NEVER far away and He is our strength! So by Jesus crying out "My God, My God, why have you forsaken me?!", He isn't crying out because God has turned His back on His son. No, He is reciting a Psalm of David. As my Savior hangs on the cross for my sins, HE SINGS! He praises God!
    So I dont know about anyone reading this, but my God loves me. And my God is not intimidated by the sin in my life. Therefore, my Jesus didnt hang on the cross, asking God why He turned His back on Him. My Jesus sang Him praises because He knew His Father was right there next to Him like He promised! MY SAVIOR HUNG ON A CROSS AND SANG! YAY GOD!
   

How Great Is Our God

       Hello everyone! I am so sorry about the lack of blog posts, for the past few weeks I have been locked out of my blog! I was so annoyed until I realized; mmmhhhh maybe ask God? And low and behold, I try to get on my blog and its up! I dont even have to sign in! YAY GOD!
       I will try to catch up on everything that has been happening, but these last few weeks have been CRAZY! We had our lectures on the Holy Spirit two weeks ago, and wow was that incredible! I was not raised going to church and the first church I have ever called my home was very conservative compared to what I have been experiencing here. So learning about the gifts of the Spirit confirmed the yearning in my heart. I was missing the Holy Spirit! I was going after God in all the wrong places! For me, I couldnt encounter Him in the sunday sermons at church or in my random prayers I would throw up either out of desperation or obligation. My soul needed to pursue Him, but I had no idea how! My relationship with God has changed so drastically since I have been here and I have learned that I am not afraid! I told myself I needed to be afraid of what God could do because every thing I had known taught me to be afraid of the Holy Spirit. But I am not afraid anymore! He is more than the "Holy Spirit", as someone close to me says "He is my old friend". My friend to guide, comfort, and empower me!
   As crazy as some of this might sound to people... oh well, its what happened! Our speaker anointed me in the Holy Spirit and prayed over me, but before that I asked God for the gift of tongues so that I may be able to worship Him when my words and my dance fails. And He gave it to me! He is such a loving God who just wants to lavish His gifts on us! After that, this man prophesied over us all and spoke so much truth it blew us away! God gave him words of knowledge for us and he spoke things over me I had never heard or thought about. Again God blew my expectations of what I would hear out of the water and awakened my heart to more dreams!
     That same week, I received healing!!! For any of those who dont know, I have been suffering from chronic illnesses and pain since I was 8 years old. God promised me healing while I was here and I got it! And as another testament to His GREAT love; He gave me a choice. He told me He could miraculously heal me that moment and I would never struggle again and be blessed. OR the healing could be a process in which He could show me so much more and I would be very blessed. My God is so intriguing, I couldnt resist knowing how much more He had to show me! So as I have been trying to reaffirm in my fellow eager YWAMers, is that I am healed! I may have my bad days, but they are never as bad as they have been because He is there! Because I am healed and He is teaching and molding me and my brothers and sisters here. Since I fully surrendered my body to Him, He has been showing me ways of working out and dancing that are good for me! And actually ease the pain! YAY GOD!
    God is so good! I am not even worthy of this suffering. I am not worthy of being used as an example and yet He uses me any way! As my body crumbles around me, He holds tight every piece and rebuilds me! Thank you God! Thank you Daddy!
   I will post more later about the following weeks. But I hope that my story hasnt freaked you out, but instead given you hope! Because our God is great! He is endlessly amazing in every way, and our praises for Him are not because of what He can do for us, but for WHO HE IS! YAY GOD!

Shall We Dance?

   Have you ever felt like you were living the life of someone else? As if the person that you are that day, isnt you at all? I have felt like a wallflower; looking at the dancing going around me, but not dancing myself. That doesnt sound like me at all! 

   I imagine that I am at a ball and the most handsome man in the entire room walks up to me and asks "Shall we dance?" The excitement overwhelms me and my giddy squeals are inaudible. He is by far the best dancer ever, but I dont know His steps. I dont know how He leads, so I hesitate. My distrust means He cant guide me as He wants. But instead of giving up and trying to find another partner. He asks again, "Shall we dance?" The more I dance with Him, the more I trust. The more I dance, the more I learn the steadiness of His arms around me and the tender strength He uses to guide me. He is such a gentleman, asking me to dance instead of forcing me onto the floor. 

   He reaches out His hand and asks me that familiar question and I take a hold! Suddenly, I am dancing like I have never danced before! I dare not let go as He gracefully leads me across the room. He spins me and dips me; I turn with a purpose and leap across the room! Everyone is staring at this amazing dancer and I smile in awe because its the only thing I know to do. The room gets silent, because this dancer has taken their breath away and I am His endlessly lucky partner, getting to dance in the light He is exuding! My heart screams YAY GOD as I fall more in love with each step....

   I am no wallflower. I am not some timid girl who doesnt want to leap across the room with Jesus! That is not the dancer He made me, not at all! So I will take His hand and trust Him to teach me how to dance the dance He has planned for me. 

   My question to everyone reading this is, is God asking the same thing? Has the most handsome man in the room approached you and asked "Shall we dance?" 

   

Random Adventures thus far...

- tried Vegemite (i dont recommend it)
- went to the Gold Coast and lost one of my roomates
- went to Brisbane and lost another one of my roomates
- befriended a gecko named Jonah
- somehow got known around the base by my laugh... apparently i can be loud, who knew?!
- modeled in a medieval fashion show 
- got killed by a poisonous dart by an old lady in an Australian short film
- wake up monday, tuesday, and thursday at 5:50 for our 6am practices
- had to learn to let go when Jeffrey became the "Base Bear" 
- became addicted to "Tim Tam Slams"
- attempt to make a mocha each morning with nasty protein powder and instant coffee
- repeatedly fall off the top bunk in the mornings
- accidentally swung off like Tarzan once...
- flipped a coin onto my head
- got trapped on a train 
- saw my best friend in the entire world!
- tried and failed to do an Australian accent
- performed my first solo dance at a medieval festival
- died and streak of my hair red

more to come! YAY GOD!

Tulips and Oak Trees

    A lovely girl I dance with named, Amanda, taught me this little analogy. She said that everyone is a tulip or and oak tree. Sometimes, you are strong and can handle things on your own (like an oak tree) and sometimes you are delicate (like a tulip) and need someone to come along side you.
   I feel like a tulip today as God has asked me to surrender my family to Him. This has actually been something He has been consistently asking of me, but I haven't really been grasping what that means until recently.
   My family is everything to me. My parents have taught me almost everything I know; my brothers and sisters filled in the rest. There isn't a story worth telling that doesn't have one of them involved. They are my smile! Which is why my senior year was probably my hardest. My parents marriage was ending, roughly. And we were all hurting. The enemy just tore into us like I had never seen and before I knew it, my family didn't seem like my family anymore... But then came healing. I felt God telling me to move out of my parents house for my health because the stress was a little too much too handle. But our faithful God put me in the best place I could have imagined and He went to work mending my heart.
   This past year, I have seen Him do the same thing for my family as a whole and individuals. One of my favorite things about my family, is that we are survivors, but not every one has realized it yet. But they don't always see what I see in them; the people God has made them or is making them to be.
    My dad is the most persevering man I know. He has sacrificed everything for us and being "Daddy's little girl" is probably my most favorite role in the world. He is always there.
    My mama is the strongest woman I have ever known. Her way with people is so infectious and inspiring. On my weakest days, she was her strongest as she never stopped fighting for me. If I am half the woman she is, then I will consider myself immensely blessed.
  My big sisters are beautiful! And I don't just mean that they are outwardly breath-taking (which they are), but I mean in the sense that their HEARTS possess true beauty. They are strong like my mama and they are woman that you cant help to notice because there is something attractively different about them.
  And my brothers... oh my dear brothers. They are everything a sister could ever hope and want. These young men are passionate and bold; there ferocity for the things they love will stop every one in their tracks.

That is my family. That is the family that God created for me to have and I have a dream. I have a dream for my family that one day, we will come together again as more than just biological family, but as brothers and sisters in Christ! I dream we are standing together, fighting! Fighting for the things of God and purely for His glory! Whether its in the central valley of California, or the depths of an unreached nation; we are there fighting. My parents, divorced or not, have laid aside their differences and offer their unique talents and gifts for much more than this world can offer. My sisters tender hearts and strong voices speak out for those who don't have the freedom to speak at all. And my brothers, my brothers that are built to lead nations, are there! Being the leaders God has called them to be and leading the lost from the darkness. Our husbands/wives/children are with us, and we are all united as one team under God. And together, the Holy Spirit uses us to bring His love to those who have never experienced it!
    That may just be a childlike fantasy that a little girl who loves her family so much desires. However, this little girl, chooses to believe that it is her families calling! To be an oak when the other is a tulip. To submit ourselves as one unit over to the Holy Spirit so He can use us for much greater things then we could have ever imagined. That this time of healing, brings us closer than we could have ever known.
    So Lord, I trust You. I know in my heart of hearts that You are working in my family and drawing us all to You. You wont give up on us! You love them more than I ever could and You hear my cries. You hear my heart screaming "Not my family! We will not be broken!". And You have answered, You have answered with love, patience, and gentleness. Thank you for endlessly being our "oak tree". Thank you God, for taking my family into Your steady hands and not letting go. Amen.
 
 

Joyce

    Isnt it great how our God can take instances in your life and use it time and time again to teach you knew things? That is what I experienced this week with a memory from when I was a little girl.
    It was a Sunday morning and I woke up with a purpose. I went to my dad, still in my pjs, and told him that I wanted to make a card for our neighbor Joyce. Joyce, was not a nice lady. I remember her always yelling at me and my siblings for getting to close to her garden or being too loud during the day. But that morning, I KNEW that I needed to make her a card. So I did. It wasnt an astounding piece of art work in the least; just a little picture of the sun (probably with sunglasses on) and my sloppy, childlike writing that was  illegible. When I approached her door, I had no fear like the previous times in the past (we usually tried to avoid her at all costs). She answered fairly quickly and with a surprisingly kind smile, had me read my card out loud for her. As I looked up expecting a reaffirming smile at my brilliant diction, I saw instead that she was crying. She said to me "thank you so much for that card Paige, I really needed it today. You see, my mom died last night and I am really sad." My heart broke with the idea of anyone's mom dying and I did all I knew to do when someone was sad, I hugged her.
     On my way home, I was ecstatic! I knew God wanted me to write that card for her and I couldnt wait to tell my parents how nice she was! As fast as my "yittle yegs" and slippers would take me, I hurried home to my ever encouraging parents to tell them the story.
     Over the years this story and Joyce has come to mind. For the years after that day Joyce was nothing but nice to us! It was as if a completely new lady had moved in down the street! The change was evident and I never really understood until now. Whenever my dad told the story I would feel the excitement I had that day, knowing that I had done something right. I also patted myself on the back for being "such a sweet kid", but my perception of it was so closed off. The point of the story was not me being sweet or Joyce needing a hug of a child, it was about what God could do. God loves us all individually, but acts for the purpose of the whole community. Our God is so powerful that EVERYTHING He does ripples into more. Through the simple act of obeying His call to write a letter, He began the process of teaching me to hear His voice and taught me an important lesson of who He wanted me to be. And just as my parents were excited for their little girl, so was He - and I could feel it! But He didnt stop there, He melted the heart of an old woman and as far as I could tell, changed her life. It was a BEAUTIFUL act of our God that rippled into mine, my families, Joyces, and who knows how many others lives. That is the God who created us! A God, that comforts you in the least expected ways, that melts your heart with His love, and guides us with His voice. YAY GOD!

Thank you Lord for Your love! A love that never ceases to have a rippling affect! Thank you Father, for always, outrageously loving your children! Amen.

A Beautiful Princess of the King

"And it is My desire to lavish My love on you" 1 John 3:1

     I promised that I would be honest with my blog and so I will be. God has just been pouring His love on me since I have been here. I came here thinking I knew Gods love for me, but I was so wrong! And just as He promised, He has been showing me what His love means in my life!

      I am a beautiful Princess of the King. I love you Daddy! I want to know and believe the truth you speak over me! I love love love you! You have made me a precious jewel and you gather me in your arms and hold me close! You want me to shine like You! You want me to be the moon. A moon that lights the night sky because I am reflecting You! I reflect You to light a dark world. I belong to You, Abba. I belong to You and You treasure me! I love You Lord! How can a God who created the heavens and the earth, find me beautiful? You gave song to every bird in the sky and yet You love to hear my songs for You! You taught the waves how to be tossed about in the ocean and yet You smile in my dances for You! You are everything! You are I AM and yet you allow me to call You, Father. Your love floors me, yet you help me soar! Thank you, thank you, thank you Lord!!!

       As the verse reads, God wants to LAVISH His love on us and boy does He! The term, Beautiful Princess of the King was the term God had just recently been spoken over me. I didnt truly grasp what it meant until today. That was when I realized, God had been trying to show me that from the beginning! I am the youngest girl out of 6 children; automatically making me the Princess. I was always Daddy's little girl and that remains true today. However, I never realized that it was the role that God himself had given me. 

    I have just been bubbling and bursting with joy today because I am loved. And Gods love is all I need. I pray the same for all who are reading this. That you encounter God and are so overwhelmed by His love that  you never look back! Because 1 John 3:1, is for all of us so we should rejoice and be glad in it! 

This is Pure of Heart by Kari Evans. She is a MAD student focusing on photography and her first assignment was to show her name meaning: Pure of Heart. When she asked me to be her model, I struggled because I have never considered myself pure of heart. God worked in my heart that day and this is such a YAY GOD moment for me! Thank you Lord for being our Redeemer!

Y.H.W.H

YHWH (yahweh) this name of god has absolutely blown my mind! 

YHWH

Yud.            He.      Wad.      He.

Hand.   Window/behold.     Nail.     Behold.

translation: Behold the Hand, behold the Nail

The name yahweh was one of the most holy of names for God from the very beginning! This was before Jesus died on the cross; years and years before God ever even sent Him to earth! It is so beautiful to see that God is savior. Savior is one of the endless characteristics of God. He didnt BECOME a savior just because we needed it. He has always/and always will be a savior; He just chose then to reveal it to us. God is so good!!! He knew the need before we ever could imagine because he knew we would need Him. We need all aspects of Him whether we can put that into words or not. He was and is a savior and because He loves us, He is ours! YAY GOD!!!

That is one of the many incredible aspects of Gods character I have been learning about this week in my lectures. Our first week is on the Character and Nature of God and its fantastic!!! All these years, i thought i understood that God loved me. He promised me this week that I have NO IDEA how much He actually does. He also promised me, that He will show me :) 

YAY GOD!!!

      This past week has been so fun! it was a whole lot of orientation and getting to know each other, but what a week its been! this past saturday we went to the park and played sports. it was quite interesting watching all these art oriented people try and figure out how to play sports. (especially for me) but it was a blast! i am still sore, but my team won a game!!! i had to run around and i actually ran kind of fast! yay god! they all teased me a bit by my inability to not scream when trying to do a play but that was bound to happen.
  On sunday, we all went out to breakfast. the breakfast here at the base consists of cold cereal and toast; naturally, we were craving some eggs and bacon! afterwards, we did a bit of shopping at the mall for a few things we needed. as fun as it all was i was floored by the price of everything! the minimum wage here is $16 so everything is way more expensive!!! its tough adjusting and slightly intimidating. but oh well, god will provide! just like he will provide the rest of my outreach costs and my living expenses. Later that night was amazing! My friends and i missed church so we could eat dinner here so we did our own thing! what was going to be a little bit of worship then discussion turned into the most incredible worship time i have had in a long time! We were sitting around singing and i just felt god telling me to "dance". of course i went through the process of debating/doubting. but i decided to just go for it! so i danced! it was the first time i had ever danced during worship and completely surrendered the movement to the lord. and it was liberating! people were singing and praying and reading scripture. one moment people are crying and the next i am so overcome with joy that i burst out laughing and cant quiet down! our god is so amazing! he is a god that can bring people to their knees in tears and one second later have another bursting out in a fit of giggles because of his excitement. YAY GOD!
    This dts does SO much more than realized. we have a lot of homework to do, along with a lot of challenging courses and workshops. we also do weekly community outreaches on Wednesday. we are going to be doing art/sport in the park! a time where we will be inviting the entire neighborhood to come; play sports, paint, sing, dance, and eat with us! its going to be great fun and a good way to get to know some people from the community. that fun-filled afternoon will be filled by a worship night at our base that we open up to the community and invite them to worship with us. i am really looking forward to it all!
     Along with learning about all this, i started my dance focus class. and instead of intense training in technique it will be a complete focus on glorifying god. and we will learn how to use dance as communication, as intercession, and as a tool in spiritual warfare. i am so excited!!! to do these things, we will be doing improv and our own choreography. plus we will have a number of performances on stages and on our outreaches. there will be two big dances we will learn to perform, but one of the dances will not be seen by anyone. it will be just for God. i cant even describe to you guys how excited i am to start dancing with god.

thank you all for your continuous support! please be praying for me and my fellow YWAMers!

us looking awkward in the city!

the amazing girls in my room!

beautiful architecture in the city!

such pretty flowers!!!

this is part of the base i am at

ironically i was wishing that we would all be great friends. then i threw the penny directly up and it hit me on the top of my head; it instantly bonded us.

BRISBANE!!!

ADDRESS!!!

Paige Laurent
671 Samford rd,
Mitchelton, Queensland 4053

Send me letters and things! we could also be pen-pals which would be a blast! (so you could also send me paper and envelopes) ooo and pictures of you guys!

bib bic bic

Made it here alive! YAY GOD! nobody slipped crack in my suitcase and i didnt get arrested (which was probably my biggest fear of traveling internationally). i also had a very enjoyable ride down to the airport with the most amazing man i get to call my boyfriend. He among many others have been such an incredible support with this trip - that i dont know how i would have gotten onto that plane without the Holy Spirit consistently using them to encourage me in the most oppurtune times.

both plane rides went pretty well! but they were long. quite long indeed that when i finally did start walking around, my legs werent quite sure what to do with themselves. naturally, some stumbling occurred. but God placed me by a very sweet, talkative woman whose son had done YWAM for many years! her and her husband were so kind and just took me in as a daughter for the duration of the never-ending flight. she was just one of the many little blessings God pours onto us each day. 

Fiji was breathtaking! step off of the plane took my breath away and i felt that familiar smack in the face when you somehow forget just how amazing our creator can be. i could have stayed surrounded by those mountains forever! it was intense to see such a beautiful place with people flocking into it! then to pick up the local newspaper and read about the violence and poverty that goes along with it. a woman i met on the plane had just come from there and talked about books she brought to a classroom who literally had none. it boggles my mind how people can be snorkeling and relaxing on a beach where about 40ft away there will be men neck high in the water trying to hunt just so their family has something to eat. if you are reading this right now, i encourage you to pray for Fiji in any way you feel lead.

Australia is beautiful! i am excited to see more of it and will hopefully be going into the city tomorrow! the people are great and i feel as if i have already made friends with the people that are going to be sisters to me these next fews months! i cant wait. the jet lag is ridiculous, so i am going to try and rest. 

i miss you all! please be praying for me - that my homesickness eases and that i can enjoy all the blessings God has in store. please be praying the same for my fellow YWAMers. and dont forget Fiji!

10 DAYS TO GO! YIKES!

Yikes, there is no better word for what I am feeling right now! after anticipating a trip like this for the past 2 years now I am in panic mode! leaving in 10 days... that is basic math I can do in my head and that is when I know its time to worry! Each day I am experiencing conflicting feelings of "When will it come already" to "crap, crap, crap, i am leaving the country!". 

  Isnt it amazing how much of a rock our God is? I have been coming to appreciate that aspect of His character a lot more lately. My rock, my fortress, my stronghold - My God. As I flail about like a fish out of water, He just scoops me up into His hands; not intimidated by the mountains of fear in my life. That feeling in my heart alone makes this entire trip worth it already. Thank you Lord, for never-moving, never-failing, and always loving me. 

 With all my panic, I have just felt so unlovable these past few days and yet He showers me with it. In this frantic state, I have found myself whining to the Lord and as my true Father He just tells me to "Hush child". The idea of silence is a hard one for me and my character, but on this journey I am beginning to appreciate the value of a whisper. And when I finally do "hush up", He whispers His love to me whether its in the breeze that makes the trees blow or the baby in Starbucks smiling at me. 

  So by standing on a rock and feeling the gentle breeze, I could not be more excited for Australia!!! I cant wait to meet the people that will be my family for the next 6+ months, to see the beautiful country, to dance solely for my God, and to rely completely on my Father who loves me. 

Please pray for me fellow brothers and sisters! I could use prayer for my fundraising (I am about $5000 away YAY GOD), prayer for my health that is always a battle, and pray that everything this trip brings knocks me into the arms of Jesus.

Oh, and if you would like to receive monthly emails on my trip please give me your email! And also be in prayer for my friend Kristen who is going to England with YWAM (YAY GOD)!!!    

GOALS IN AUSTRALIA

1. Not get eaten by a giant spider or snake of ANY kind
2. Pet a wild kangaroo
3. Hold a koala
4. Go to Hillsong United Church
5. Go to the zoo
6. Master an Australian accent

more to come...

YAY GOD!!!

Hello! this is my blog in which i will be posting on for my missions trip! I am going to YWAM's (Youth With A Mission) base in Brisbane, Australia for 3 months where i will be doing my Discipleship Training and then from there going to another country and doing a missions trip for another 3 months. I can not even begin to tell you how excited i am for this adventure that God is giving me! if i tried to put my excitement into words it would probably come out a little like this "WWWWEEEEEE!!!!!VNDOAHDLNSRJSLVS!!!!!!!!!!!!" if you know me really well you are probably(hopefully) chuckling to yourself because i was able to so accurately desribe it.
   Currently, my status with this trip is all preparation and a LOT of fundraising! It has proven very challenging so far and i know that God and God alone is going to get me through this. i figured that out in the application progress because every step of the way was some obnoxious battle or work to just get my application in fully!  Now its about disciplining myself to get the things and paperwork done! this has proven to be especially challenging for me because my coping mechanism for overwhelming things is just to ignore it and pretend like its not there. naturally, that is not a good way to try and go about things when it comes to leaving the country. oh well, i am learning at least!
   I think that the fact that i will be LIVING IN ANOTHER COUNTRY, not being able to speak or see my friends and family, being away from everything i know, and BEING USED BY GOD in ways that i never even knew imaginable - all those things havent really hit me yet... I am so focused on getting everything together and getting the money that i need in that i have not given myself the chance to thoroughly freak out and scream my excitement yet. (the freaking out/ dancing around/ screaming for joy is all apart of it hitting me).
   My goal and desires for this trip is that my goal and desires match the Lords. that in every part of this adventure; everything i learn and every person i meet is glorifying to my Lord Jesus Christ. i want to worship Him through every second of this and really learn who it is He has made me to be and how i can use that for Hsis glory. my God is AMAZING!!!!!!!! i just know that this entire trip is going to be one gigantic YAY GOD moment!!!!!
   That is where i am at as of now with all this stuff!!!! i promise, the more i blog the more i will become blog savvy. I would like to think that i will be able to fill my blogs with fascinating stories and convicting thoughts, but i am all over the place. I forewarn you; if i am super excited about something then it may come out a little confusing and exuberant. I invite you to follow my blog and see what our God is doing in my life and over seas! Prayer is always appreciated so please be praying! and feel free to contact me over facebook and/or skype, i would love to keep in touch!